Rosie O’Donnell, the star of the new Oprah Winfrey Network, finally got her wish as Oprah paid to have her vagina removed and a penis was attached to the 40 year old plus lesbian. Surgeon Dave Stumble said “her pussy smelled like shit and is the most hideous thing ever seen. No wonder she wanted a cock. It even blabbered something that no one knew what language it was speaking” Rosie, who is set to debut the Oprah Network was in the best of spirits including getting teary eyed when she urinated standing up for the first time. “This is so awesome. I hope it attracts a lot of women.”
Cowboys Tight End Martellus Bennett has issued another apology after the “dick pics” nightmare claiming he never knew a bent shower rod was in the background. ”Nothing is more embarrassing than a bent shower rod, not even my big black penis being circulated around the world wide web by a mad ex girlfriend. I am ashamed. I ashamed for Cowboys Nation and the Dallas Cowboys organization, Jerry Jone,s and myself. It’s so tacky and ghetto.” said the Dallas Cowboys star.
The San Antonio Spurs’ George Hill has called The Portland Trail Blazers’ Greg Oden out and challenged him to a Dick Pick Challenge.
Portland Trailblazers Center Greg Oden’s ”dick” pics now circulating online have all but confirmed what people around the world have been speculating. African Americans have huge, humongous penises. Stuart Lovett, 34, says “I had heard about them having big ole tallywhackers, but my God. You could sit on it like a bench in a park.” Leslie Smith, 18, says “Wow. White people are really small compared to that. Now, I know why all the cheerleaders in my class are banging blacks.” Why yes Leslie, now we all do!, thanks to Greg Oden’s hairy hang down all over the internet.